The Battle Between Pride and Sanity

So here was my day:
I woke up, late as matter of fact. I wanted to get up at 5, but I set my alarm wrong and ended up getting up at 6:30. My back-up alarm, Steve, woke me up.
I then started to study for my ecology test. I was feeling pretty good, not doing hardcore cramming, but just reviewing all the material.
At 11:30 I ate lunch with Holly in the kitchen.
Then at noon I began to study Ecology some more.
At 12:30 I headed to Ecology class. When I got there, I did some last minute review with some classmates.
At 1:00 I took my Ecology test. At this moment, I knew I did not ace the test, but I believed that I did not fail the test either.
At 2:00 I went to Biology II Lab
At 3:15 I got out of Bio II lab and went to Work
At 4:30 I left work and ran to Smiths to pick up food for my STC meeting
At 5:30 I went to my STC meeting. We worked on our newsletter today.
At 7:00 I left the STC meeting and went to my Political Science class. I was sitting in class when I realized that I had mixed up two questions on my Ecology test. I started to slightly freak out and started to believe that I may have actually failed the test. At this moment my desire to go to school plummetted, and I almost left class. But being the good student that I am, I stayed in class physically, but my mind was wandering. I was burnt out from studying and lab and work and STC.
At 8:15 I left class and came and sat at my computer. I checked my email quickly and browsed MSNBC.
At 9:00 I started to work on my book report for Psychobiology of Sex that is due tomorrow.
Around 11:00 I started to talk to Steve on the phone and broke down.
As you can see, my day was consumed with homework, studying and class. I feel like prisoner to my books and my computer. Tonight I realized that I have a big problem. Actually, I broke down tonight.
See, I'm taking 18 credit hours this semester. 15 credit hours are 3 credit classes, then I have two one credit lab classes, and then a one credit physical recreation class. That's a total of 8 classes that fill up my time. Then I work at ICASA, am the president of STC, have dishes to do, and I have a husband. Not to mention, at the moment, I am sleep deprived. It's enough to drive a girl insane, and I'm almost there.
While talking on the phone to Steve tonight, I vented out that I feel completely overwhelmed with school. It's been very hard to keep on top of all my homework. It's draining too. And the more time I spend doing homework the less I feel motivated to do anything. So Steve suggested I dropped a class.
NO WAY!!
No way was I going to drop a class. I would be a failure to drop a class. I'm only allowed to drop one class during my college carreer, and I already used that oppurtunity. Steve tried to convince me that it was ok to drop classes, but I would not have any of it. I DO NOT quit. I DO NOT give up. And if I dropped a class, I would be giving up.
Steve and I continued to talk about the possibility of me dropping a class. He finally had me somewhat convinced that it would be the best thing for me to drop a class, but which one? The two options were Political Science or Pyschobiology of Sex. Steve suggested I drop Poli Sci, but I was not sure. I like Psychobiology of Sex better than I like Poli Sci, but I know how to get an A in poli sci. By the end of the conversation I was frustrated, and was on the verge of tears. I knew Steve was right. I know I need to drop a class, but I would feel like a quiter, like a failure, if I dropped a class.
When Steve and I got off the phone I went and talked to Holly, and she said pretty much the same thing. She talked about how she dropped all these classes in the past and that it's ok to drop classes. I wouldn't be a failure or a quiter.
So, I decided that I'm going to drop Pyschobiology of Sex. I really like this class, but it would be the best to drop. 80% of the grade is based off of tests, and I suck at tests. Poli Sci has essay tests, which I am a lot better at.
I asked Steve to hold me accountable, and make sure I actually drop the class. And I do feel like a quiter, but I know that it will be best for me in the end. I have too many things on my plate, and there is nothing wrong with removing something if it's in the best interest. So my pride tells me that I shouldn't drop the class; I made it 5 weeks into the semester, why stop now? But my sanity is threatening that if I don't free up some time it will leave me, and I will go insane.
Tomorrow I am going to retrieve a drop slip and drop Psychobiology of Sex. I really do not want to, but I know it will be best. This is really hard to do, but the good thing is that I don't have to finish the book report that is due tomorrow. :)
-Carmelita

Praise God, The Week is Over

What a rough week this past week was, for me at least. Steve had some little annoyances throughout the week as well.

First, let's talk about happy things first. Valentines Day was obviously on Tuesday, and Steve and I volunteered to be on a "Married people panel" for NMT's Intervarsity. It was quite interesting. There were four couples, and people from the audience asked questions about marriage and all the fun stuff that go with it. It was a little weird being on this panel because about three years ago I was in the audience asking the questions, and now here Steve and I were being asked the questions. Despite the akwardness, Steve and I had a wonderful time, and Steve enjoyed seeing old friends. The ones that are still there at least.

Aside from the wonderful Valentines evening, the week was rough on both Steve and me. Steve injured his knee almost two weeks ago while we were playing racquetball, and he has yet to recover. Basically he hyperextended his knee, and it bugs him. He has this cute little limp, but this injury is causing some slight annoyances. First he has to take the elevator at work as opposed to taking the stairs. Then there's the task of getting to school. Our trailer in Albuquerque is near UNM, and so Steve usually rides his bike to school. Well, since his knee hurts, he has to find an alternative way to get to school. You would think that it would be easy living only 5 minutes away, but it has been tough. Poor Steve. Man, I am sure grateful for the free parking we have at Tech.

My week was very tiring. Taking 18 hours is a lot harder than I want it to be, but I'm not going to give it up. This week though, I suffered in the form of no sleep. I had a take-home test due Wednesday, a test on Thursday, and a project also due on Thursday. Not to mention the daily reading for my Westerns class (which average about 50 pages). So, between Tuesday and Wednesday night I got about 7 hours of sleep, and spent most of my waking hours in front of my computer and studying. Finally, on Thursday night I was able to sleep. I slept so hard that I didn't hear my phone, which was right by my pillow, ring four differnt times. I have pretty much caught up on sleep and I'm ready to take on next week, which comprises of two tests and a paper. Bring it on!!!

Praise God the weekend is here! I'm looking forward to spening lots of time with Steve. Of course I will be doing some homework, but not until Steve takes me to go see Curious George. I love Curious George, and he is going to take me to see it tomorrow. I'm so excited. He is such a great husband!

-Carmelita

My Mother, My Hero

I am completely opposite of my mother, and my father for that matter too. Sometimes it's amazing that my mother raised me and I did not pick up many of her traits and habits, as many kids do. Now, there are some things that I catch myself doing that is totally my mother, but for the most part, we are complete opposites.

Despite this fact, I love her so much. She is my hero, and I thank God for her. Like every child, there are a few things that we wish we could change about our parents. One of my big things was my mother's smoking. I believe she started smoking when she was 16 years old, and now at the age of 44, she is still at it. I used to tell her that her lungs were black and would feel like tar, but she would just tell me to shut-up. I have never quite understood how hard it is to stop smoking.

Well, last week, while talking to my mother on the phone, she told me that her and my stepdad, Joe, decided that it was time to stop smoking. My heart rejoiced and I became so proud of my mother. My mom continued to tell me of her plan, and how hard it had been the last few days. She explained that it's really hard to give it up, both physically and emotionally. It's not just a habit, it's part of her life. Despite this, she is trying her best, because she knows that it's time to give this up. So, down to only 4 cigarettes a day, my mother has taken on the strenuous task of quitting smoking.

I'm so proud of her. I am hoping that this time she conquers the smoking habit. Keep her in your prayers, and if you have any tips on how to conquer this deadly habit, email them to me. I'm pretty sure she can take all the advice she can.

Yeah..Go Mom! You can do it!!! We believe in you!

-Carmelita

The Virginian and other enjoyable things

I have just finish reading a great book - The Virginian by Owen Wister. Now, I was forced to read this book. I'm taking Western Novels this semester and this was the first book we read. Oh, and it was wonderful. I highly recommend this book to anyone who likes westerns, and anyone who loves a good book. Ok, so that is a broad range there, "anyone who likes a good book," but it truly is such a good book.

I finished reading The Virginian last night. It only took me two weeks to read, but that was rough because I have a million other books to read this semester. (This semester is the semester of reading) We are reading 8 western novels this semester, which averages out to be one book every two weeks. I hope the rest of the books are as good as The Virginian, because reading an enjoyable book does not feel like homework.

Aside from drowning in reading, and being swept away to the West (wait, I'm already in "the West") by the Virginian, everything is going great. Steve is still enjoying his classes, and he has a better outlook on his job. There was a brief period of time a month ago where he really was not that happy about his job. But they bought him a new "toy" at work, and he is excited about using it. I know that this "toy" is a DAQ card and some software to go along with it, but you will have to ask him to explain why he is so excited about his new "toy." Maybe he'll blog all about it one day!

This past weekend Steve and I celebrated our 8 month "monoversary." Can you believe we have been married for 8 months already. I remember this time last year when I was anxiously awaiting June so I could call Steve my husband. And now here we are - 8 months later...and happy as ever. I love being married to him. He is such a great guy.

To celebrate our 8 months of marriage, Steve took me to eat at Japanese Kitchen in Albuquerque. It is a Japanese Teppanaki, where they cook your food at your table. It's a little impersonal because you are seated at the table with 6 other people, but it's wonderful food and it was wonderful to be there with my husband. We went to a restaurant of that type on our Honeymoon, and that was one of my favorite parts of the Honeymoon.

I love being married, and I can say that Steve is enjoying it just as much as I am. It's one of the best things about life right now, and we highly suggest getting married. It's a wonderful experience. And to think, we are only 8 months into it. We have so many years and experiences yet to come!

-Carmelita